Charlie bounded out of bed early Tuesday morning, excited about his upcoming business trip. His promotion had included the brief to travel to Russia to meet with business associates there to close a big deal for the company. He had obtained the necessary invite from a Russian travel agency, now all he needed was a visa. With his appointment slip in hand he headed downtown.
Parking his car in the garage and heading for the Russian consulate he was pulled up short by the line that confronted him several hundred feet from the entrance. He looked at his appointment slip again. Must be something wrong, he thought to himself, i'm on time, why are there more than a hundred people here at the same time? Inquiring of some of the others it soon became clear there was no mistake.
Resigning himself to the wait, he opened his newspaper and got caught up as the line slowly moved forward. When he got inside he took out his forms and joined a short line for the window he was assigned. Faced with a frightful looking woman with a large hairy mole next to her nose and a ratted hairdo, he tried not to stare at the mole, but she was looking at him like something she had discovered on the bottom of her shoe.
Presenting his passport and forms with a hopeful smile he bid her good day. With a silence that hung like icicles between them she examined his passport and then his forms. "Where is form 54XC3?" she inquired in a raspy voice.
"Form 54XC3? I, well, the travel agency said I needed the forms I filled out and my pass..."
"Form 54XC3! You must have! You are wishing to go to Russia on business, yes?"
"Well, yes, I..."
"Over there." She lifted her chin toward a counter next to a rack of forms. Charlie couldn't help noticing the mole seemed to be doing the pointing.
"Alright, do I bring it back here?"
"Nyet. Business visa window is window 4." She shoved his papers at him and the interview was over.
Trudging over to the rack Charlie could fee his shoulders tensing. He filled out the new form and got in line at window 4, where he was soon face to face with a new vision of horror even more severe than the last one. She perused his papers and looked up. "What business you have in Russia?"
"Well, i'm going there to try to close a business deal with a company we've been negotiating with and..."
"I see. Then you will be needing form 54XC4, not 54XC3, is over there." She indicated the rack.
"But I was told..."
"Next!" She pushed his passport and forms back to him.
His blood pressure rising, Charlie stormed back to the rack. In line once again at window 4 he did some deep breathing. A few minutes later it was time for round three.
"What is reason for visit to Russia?"
"Well, we already went through this, you told me to fill out form..."
"You will answer the question!"
"I'm going there to close a business deal. I've filled out form 54XC4, see?"
"You will be staying in Russia for how long?
"Eight days."
"So, is more than one week? You will need to fill out form SP32X7. Is over there."
His temples beginning to throb, Charlie fought for control. "Why didn't the travel agency give me that form, they knew how long I was going to be gone?"
The woman rolled her eyes. "Do I look like travel agent?"
Biting his tongue, Charlie made his way back to the rack and then made his fifth trip to the window.
"Ok, here's form SP32X7, and I sure hope..."
"Nyet, form SP32X7 can only be processed at window 2. Is over there." She waved in the general direction.
Charlie could feel the room darkening and closing in on him. He made his way to a chair and collapsed, his papers scattering over the floor. The women at the windows gave each other a look.
Rising from the chair as soon as he felt able he collected his paperwork and shuffled to window 2 and got in line. He got there at last and put all of it down and said nothing. The clerk, whom he could swear must have been a wrestler or weightlifter earlier in life looked everything over and nodded, then put it all in a folder and tossed it onto a tray.
"Next!"
Charlie was flummoxed. "But, what about my visa?"
"Visa application will be reviewed, come back tomorrow after 10."
"What?! Nobody told me that. I...I..." He was shouting now, and a large security guard appeared at his side and escorted him forcefully to the door. He left the building and slouched his way to his car.
